A new study from UC Riverside has revealed that couples who engage in gossip together experience greater happiness and satisfaction in their relationships. The research, titled “Spill the Tea, Honey: Gossiping Predicts Well-Being in Same- and Different-Gender Couples,” highlights how the act of gossiping can strengthen emotional bonds between partners.
The study tracked 76 romantic couples, including both same-gender and different-gender pairings, using a device known as the Electronically Activated Recorder (EAR). This portable technology passively recorded conversations throughout the day. Notably, the recordings captured only about 14% of participants’ daily speech, and all couples involved were based in Southern California.
According to the findings, participants spent an average of 38 minutes gossiping daily, with nearly 29 minutes of that time dedicated to conversations with their partners. Couples who gossiped more frequently reported higher levels of personal happiness. The study also indicated that gossip contributed to better relationship quality, although the impact was somewhat less pronounced.
Senior author Megan Robbins suggested that gossiping serves as a tool for emotional intimacy. “After attending social gatherings, couples often discuss their thoughts and impressions of others in the room,” Robbins explained. This post-event gossip, whether light-hearted or reflective, helps reinforce feelings of closeness, trust, and solidarity between partners.
The study noted, “Negatively gossiping with one’s romantic partner on the way home from a party could signal that the couple’s bond is stronger than with their friends at the party, while positively gossiping could prolong the fun experiences.” This dynamic reinforces the perception that partners are “on the same team,” which enhances feelings of connectedness and contributes to overall well-being.
This research builds on Robbins’ earlier work from 2019, which challenged common myths surrounding gossip, such as the belief that women gossip more maliciously or that lower-income individuals engage in gossip more frequently. The earlier study found that gossip is more nuanced, suggesting it is neither inherently bad nor confined to specific demographics.
In the current research, the authors did not differentiate between positive, negative, or neutral gossip, emphasizing that the act of sharing perspectives itself is what matters most. This finding encourages couples to embrace gossip as a means of fostering connection, suggesting that those feeling stressed—such as individuals facing financial difficulties—might benefit from engaging in gossip to enhance their emotional bond.
Ultimately, this study underscores the importance of communication in relationships, revealing that even something as seemingly trivial as gossip can play a significant role in enhancing relationship satisfaction and personal happiness.
